Tuesday 26 May 2015

Coconut shy

As Simon Gas’s convalescence enters its final week, the Muswell Hill Director of Football sent across the runners and riders for this Friday’s encounter at Coram Fields. This is what I came up with, through the fug of a monumental hangover, (incurred at Lord’s on Thursday) - 

Blues: Mario, Paul, Mick, Antonio (another Morgan Stanley recruit), Ian Baggies, Danny, Joseph (from Morgan Stanley), Will, me

Yellows: Yev, Geoff, Patrick, Andrew (yet another colleague of Simon’s at Morgan Stanley), Dan, Ian Cortina, Tony, Simon Ink

Ergo, nine plays eight. The fact that we had Geoff and Patrick arriving after seven ‘o’ clock meant Mick temporarily played in lieu of his son, switching from Yellow to Blue on the prodigal’s arrival. (Incidentally, Yev was on time, presumably in the interests of being obtuse).

There remained much rancour and disgruntlement at the perceived imbalance in numbers (and ability), although Geoff’s failure to appear on time slipped my mind so once he arrived the overall screech of complaint begun to subside. Slightly. 

Onto the match itself then, and the Blues always looked favourites thanks a) to having the extra man, b) the presence of Mario and Will and c) the fact that Antonio transpired to be a very useful player indeed. The Italian duo of Mario and Antonio were ably supplied by the metronomic midfield excellence of Will, who had a very effective game, as per. However, despite Tony’s noisy protestations the Yellows had the not inconsiderably potent attacking triumvirate of Yev and Patrick, as well as the Hampstead auteur himself. 

As for the goals, Mario probably got three (or four) - I can recall one volleyed in from close distance and also the final goal of the evening, which saw Mario round the keeper after pouncing on an agricultural clearance from myself and coolly passing home. Mick also got at least two, his final goal coming via a run from wide on the right which saw the fiscal journalist fire home from close range. And Antonio capped a fine debut with at least two goals. Hopefully Will also got the goal(s) his performance deserved, but my memory deserts me. 

I have a more complete recollection of the Yellows’ goals, partly because Patrick scored twice past me whilst I was in nets. His first goal was spanked over my head and despite pawing at it such was the pace on the ball that I couldn’t prevent it from going in. The second effort came after I’d saved Yev’s initial shot with my feet; the ball then fell to Patrick who smashed home the rebound from an acute angle inside the near post. Simon Gas, watching on behind the goal, commented that it looked as if I was in a coconut shy, which was a fairly accurate if not altogether encouraging bon mot. Yev, unsurprisingly, also got among the goals, as did Tony, with one fine effort seeing him scythe through the Blues’ defence from a restart and smash the ball home. All in all, not a terrible game, despite the grumbling. 

Final score: Blues 9 - Yellows 6

No pub for me this week; given that I’d been out on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday I thought it politic to retire for the evening to protect my rapidly ageing liver. 

I trust you enjoyed the long weekend; join us next Friday for an eve of Cup Final special.

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