Friday 10 December 2010

Can't play tonight due to looking after dog!!

Dear Readers, unfortunately I can't play tonight because I am looking after my parents'dog. They are in the non-PC location of northern Cyprus and quite like it since they have been before. It is a real shame because my fitness levels are not too bad at the moment.

Spizz is not answering my e-mails at the moment but I hope he comes next week so that we can discuss the decline and fall of Aston Villa.

Some of the lads want to go for an Xmas curry but I want a cheap evening out, which is basically a few bits of pizza in the house pub. I am currently trying to get a "conversation" going with a few of the players on the old e-mail. I am presently slagging off Wenger for not picking English players. This has riled the Gooner fans!

Tuesday 30 November 2010

I am taking a late fitness test for this Friday.

Dear Readers, I am taking a late fitness test for this Friday. I will be a bit rusty
after a three week break but I am raring to go. The Spizz gig is this Thursday but I might be unable to go due to family commitments. We have to wait and see. I feel for Spizz after his team Aston Villa got squashed by Arsenal at the weekend. Apparently, Villa are interested in a £6m Robbie Keane, which shows they must be desperate.

A few weeks ago big Ian G. organised a brilliant competition to mark the nuptials of Big Sam, who brought one of his brothers along to play and his Dad, who smashed my record of being the oldest geezer on the pitch being north of 70. Chatting to Sam's Dad in the pub afterwards, I might have committed a faux pas by asking why he did not support Crystal Palace rather than Millwall given his Peckham birthplace. This probably showed my complete ignorance!!

Anyway the competition was played in great spirit and my team was a bit unlucky given Joe had a Robert Green between the posts and we could not quite hit the target in front of goal despite the pace of Yev and Steve A. Big Dave was immense as usual in defence but I felt I was letting the side down a bit by being really slow. But at least we can aspire to win the cup next time.

Thursday 18 November 2010

We are going to have to arrange Spizz testimonial!!

I expect we are going to have to arrange a testimonial to mark the retirement from
footie by punk star Spizz after his Dublin Castle gig, which is on Thursday, December 2nd. Sorry I have been a bit lacklustre in terms of putting out the blogs. I have got a couple of games to catch up on such as the cup competition marking the wedding of Big Sam. Suffice to say the team I played for came last in the group stage despite being strong on paper.
That was followed by a depressing 6-3 loss and an unbelievable argument about the penalty that never was.
Last week I missed because of failing a late fitness test and this is likely to be the case for tomorrow and next week. So lads, start sending in those match reports!!
PS>
The Dublin Castle is in Camden, 94 Parkway, London, NW1.

Thursday 28 October 2010

For the match report young Joe has done a poem!

An early conceit started with a lack of retreat,
Some said one side was too strong, but that denies we went wrong,
With a wedding in sight, Sam had to be right,
Alex and he scrapped in the floodlit Shoreditch night,
I could feel the shame, three goals down in one game,
It gave me a chill to say we lost three nil.

I am still shocked about the Spizz retirement. I am going to try and talk him out of
it. I still play despite having a pin in my leg and none of my colleagues passing to
me. Maybe we should try and arrange a testimonial game.

Tuesday 26 October 2010

Spizz stuns footballing world with shock announcement!

Spizz Energi frontman Spizz has stunned the footballing world with the shock announcement that he is retiring and he holding a "wake" in Bishopsgate to celebrate
the event. "I can't quite believe it, it is the end of an era, if it is true" said
an unnamed source. "I knew he was suffering from injury problems but I did not think
that they were that bad."

Spizz's footballing style was/is characterised by above-average shooting skills, a nice turn of pace (for his age!) combined with an unwillingness to track back or go
in goal unless he absolutely had to.

"I hope he is not completely lost to the world of football. Spizz could get his coaching
badge or qualify as a ref" commented the unnamed source.

Monday 25 October 2010

And a big thank you to all our readers - part two

Alan Morg. is knocked out at the worldwide following of the blog. Here are the page views by country for the period May to October 2010.
USA - 135
UK - 133
Russia -50
Canada - 25
Spain - 20
Japan - 20
France - 15
Malta - 12
Indonesia - 10
and South Korea with 8.
Last week's match report will be brought to you by Joe, who also stepped up to the plate and picked the sides. The game saw a guest appearance by John P., who relocated to Barcelona a few years back. It was great to see him eating up those yards on the pitch.
In the pub afterwards I had to commiserate with Danny, who went for it a bit with
an attempt at a long-raking pass. Unfortunately, this became a spooned-up effort infringing our over-head-height rules. But it was at least worth a go.
We are still missing Spizz, struck down by cruel injury. Hopefully, he is going to turn up this Friday for Big Sam's
bash.
As for Man Utd keeping Rooney rather than selling him, that probably will be the outcome after Fergie retires.

Thursday 21 October 2010

And a big thank you to all our readers!!

During the month there have been 68 page views from the United Kingdom, 49 from Russia, 30 from United States and 19 each from Canada and Japan. Other countries also
make it on the list. So a big thank you to all our readers!! Let's hope that Spizz recovers from injury soon so as to lead the attack.

I think I am available for selection this Friday. I am feeling the knees a bit with the change of weather. It has become quite wintry and I think it could be tracksuit bottom weather tomorrow.

My view on the Wayne Rooney affair is that he will probably go to Chelsea in the January transfer window. Real Madrid would wait until summer for a cheaper buy while I don't think Fergie's Man Utd can take the risk of selling him to Man City, since Mancini's team would probably run away with the league. I saw Real Madrid destroy Malaga on Sky during the weekend with Ronaldo and Higuain looking unstoppable and maybe Mourinho will decide that he does not need Rooney. However, the Spanish team has got players such as Benzema to offload in any part-exchange deal.

I was blown away by Gareth Bale's wonder hat trick against Inter Milan last night. But it looks like that Spurs will have to invest in a new defence and a couple of midfield holding players. Poor old Crouchie is not very good in the air. I read in the papers that his personal entourage numbers seven strong. Hopefully, they can teach him to time a jump and head the ball in the net.

Monday 18 October 2010

Last Friday saw a pulsating 3-2 victory for us!!

A few weeks ago Joe scored a nice couple of goals and was crestfallen that I had not
given them the true attention they deserved. Especially, as he showed the blog to his
girlfriend on some Greek island. However, Alan Morg. was delighted that his name was up in lights, so you can't get every report right.
Last Friday saw a pulsating 3-2 victory for us with Big Dave and Mick K. having very
solid performances. Tone opened the scoring for them when we backed off a bit. Steve A. got a nice equaliser past a despairing dive from Gashead in goal. We managed to
sneak a 2-1 lead with Yev but then Alan Morg. shot through a knot of players after a free kick to make it even. We finally came up ahead with a Steve A. winner after a good dummy from Joe I think.
Spizz was again absent and we are missing him dreadfully!! I played a so-so game down the right but it was nice to be on the winning side for once. Their best player was Alex, who was tireless in midfield.
On a sentimental note we are organising a few beers and sandwiches for Big Sam before he gets married. We are a bit alarmed he is going to spend the night the ceremony before at Ian G.'s place.

Thursday 14 October 2010

Last week saw a 5-2 result!!

Last week saw a 5-2 result although Gashead Simon apparently got a good goal for the losing side. Apparently I have been selected for tomorrow's game although my fitness is nothing to shout home about.
I could'nt go to the Spizz gig last Friday but I hope it went well.

As for England v Montenegro we needed a bit more guile while Gerrard and Rooney were playing too far back. Hopefully, we will still qualify!!

Monday 4 October 2010

Alan Morg. hits stunning hat trick!!

Chelsea supporter Alan Morg. hit a stunning hat trick in last Friday's three-three draw. Spizz was again absent with hamstring and knee problems and his earliest medical appointment is October 12th. The game was a crowded eight versus eight and our three goals were scored by Steve A. from the penalty spot, followed by a rare goal from Danny the Diplomat and a good effort from
Ross. Gashead Simon noted that we have registered two draws following his selection of the teams.

We perhaps should have won but Big Dave and Gashead were defiant in defence.

Monday 27 September 2010

I have been told to stop moaning!!

Avid readers of my blog have told me to stop moaning. I go on too much about lack of passes etc and so I will try and be more positive today. Last Friday Spizz was missing my tentative return from my last operation. The game was a pulsating 2-2 draw with Joe getting two goals for them while ours were scored by a young guest player, who played too high up the pitch for Ian G.'s liking. We had good performances from Tone and Alan Morg., who both rattled the steelwork with long-range shots while the young and old Sams produced as well.

For them Big Dave kept it tight at the back and Mick K. was good in midfield. Sheffield Andy, who said afterwards they were the moral victors, did quite well. Liverpool Danny (aka the Diplomat) had to take some stick about his team before the game but made some key saves and was unlucky not to get on the score sheet. Simon Ink. has been playing more regularly and this has benefitted his performance.

Sunday 29 August 2010

I had to face a reality check last Friday!!

Spizz was injured with a hamstring problem and was unable to come on to the pitch last Friday to match up an incredible ten versus eleven. This was a Bank Holiday weekend!! Have'nt these 7.45pmers guys got better things to do? I can understand eight versus eight but ten versus eleven. Yours truly was one of the valiant ten and we had rush keeper but it was a bit hectic. I did not realise (until Spizz explained it to me) that the opponents were wearing bright orange coloured bibs or wore some kind of red. This was VERY CONFUSING.

So out of the 7pmers it was just me and Big Ian and we were playing against each other. Ian curled in a nice goal while I had to face a reality check since passing game was not really up to scratch. However, I did get a few interceptions in. This is despite the fact my supporters know that I favour the "Bobby Charlton" style tackle.

We lost 10-3 and I did three stints in goal and did not really cotton onto the fact
that we could play rush. It was claimed that I gave away a penalty but it was not
awarded. When not in goal I stayed mostly in defence. Quite a few of our team seemed to have positional problems to put it mildly although our star player was Cliff. In addition, Tom was a very strong player but suffered from an inability to pass, which was sarcastically commented on by his fellow player Steve.

Unfortunately, I will miss next week's start of the new season for the 7pmers, who will have to get use to the fact that the beer garden of their local has been sold off and is just a hole in the ground prior to some foundations being put in.
Spizz will also be absent since he is got some promotion in Milan. He explained it to me last Friday but I did not really understand what it was about.

Thursday 26 August 2010

To continue my pre-season training I might sneak another game.

This Friday to continue my pre-season training I might sneak another game with
the 7.45pmers organised by Cliff and Kevin. This is despite the fact that Cliff warned some players would come back. However, I know Mick K. and Geoff are away for the weekend, which would leave space for me and for Spizz.Last week the indie star was unavailable for selection after a series of injuries incurred during his Tuesday game. This included a hamstring strain, which might take time to heal. These are really annoying injuries when you get older.

We don't help ourselves with few players doing a proper work-out before the game. I just run around a bit and kick the ball hopefully. I get a feeling that this Friday will not repeat the previous week's solid performance, which included a goal from a
single shot at goal.

I have talked to Gashead Simon this afternoon and he was a bit gloomy about his beloved Bristol Rovers. The young man was on altitude training in Austria to prepare for the new season and also made a visit to Trieste, which is now in Italy but was part of the Austro-Hungarian empire
and a city I would love to visit. I hope Gashead Simon has not picked up the dark arts of Italian defending as performed by Big Dave A.

Saturday 21 August 2010

Pre-season training with Cliff's game was a great success!!

Dear Reader, I joined the 7.45 game last night to get some important pre-season training. This game is organised by the brothers Cliff and Kevin, although last night Kev was not there. They support West Ham and Arsenal
respectively so they both have a cross to bear. Cliff picked the sides, which were quite well balanced, and did a long stint in goal. He was a cut above some of the players with his ball skills.

During our summer break, Spizz, Geoff, Big Dave.A and Mick K. have been keeping their football skills honed by playing the 7.45pm game. Spizz could not make it last night
but Dave and Mick warned me that the guys played a higher standard than the 7pm organised by Gashead Simon, which can be, I regret to say, a bit of a shambles.

Dave and Mick were right on the money!! Both line-ups played one-touch football at a fast and furious pace. There was tracking back and marking, which are virtually absent in the 7pm game. It is often true that you play better when you have better-quality players around you. Geoff was a lot more effective last night while yours truly ploughed a channel down the right as usual. What was most unusual was that I got on the score sheet when I passed the ball into the net with my left foot from a quickly taken free kick. I did not got much of a celebration from my team so I gave Mick K. a hug to express my emotion. This was even though he was on the opposite
side and it was possibly his mistake in not picking me up. Mick K. looked pretty perplexed.

The 7pmers did perform well last night. The four of us contributed four goals to a 5-3 thriller in a game, which was eight-a-side and which had limited space. Dave A. got a sweet goal to wrap up the match for them while Mick A. scored two goals, one a "David Villa" effort, which hits both posts and then goes in.
I was the goalie and I could not get near the shot, which was slightly deflected.
In the changing rooms afterwards, Mick K. said he remembered the assists more rather than the goals!! Mick K. was man of the match.

Dave A. was playing through the pain barrier but still managed to hit the steelwork twice before scoring his neat goal. In football terms his first love is Scottish club
Ayr United www.ayrunitedfc.co.uk Dave's English Club is Man Utd.

Wednesday 18 August 2010

Football makes me laugh!! Fergies buys player unseen.

You just have to laugh at our national game. Man Utd manager Sir Alex Ferguson buys a player he has never seen before on the say-so of friend and former colleague Carlos Queiroz. Then,
Fergie makes a general criticism on how transfer deals are so out of touch with
reality.

I know Stephen Ireland is an above-average midfield player and he is moving from Man City to Aston Villa but I don't really understand why Ireland is trousering £1.5m plus. (I suppose it is the old sign-up fee?) Man City has just gone plain loco shipping out Ireland and Craig Bellamy then getting Mario Balotelli and James Milner in return. I have seen some highlights of Balotelli and he does look an exceptional talent but the trouble with the Premier League is that all the games are competitive unlike Serie A, when there are easy clubs to play and where games in Italy are occasionally fixed. (Look at Wikipedia under Italian football corruption).
Hands up if you think James Milner is worth £27.5m.

At Manchester City, there seems to be an absolute whirlwind of deals, which must make the mouths of player agents drool. Besides Ireland, Craig Bellamy is going to Cardiff FC on a season-long where the Mancunian club is picking up half of the wages (sheer insanity!!).
Gawd knows where Robinho will go. Roque Santa Cruz (Rock Holy Cross?) is also on the way out.
Bellamy might be difficult (apparently Mancini has not spoken to him since February. But as far as the Premier League games are concerned, Bellamy would be in my team every time. I also remember when Robinho ripped apart Everton at the fortress (?) of Goodison Park.
You don't get into a Brazilian World Cup team if you are not a good player.

All of these crazy transfer fees are not going to change the expected outcome of the Premiership this season, which is a two horse race between holders Chelsea and runners-up
Man Utd. I think Chelsea has the better tactical manager in Carlo Ancelotti, who is very tough and disciplined. He seems to have made it clear to the players that when they are on the club's time then high standards of discipline are required.
However, their private lives are their own. Looking back Ancelotti gave a lot of support to John Terry (JT) with the scandal of the French bint saying basically "Private lives".

The Blues have even enlisted the help of Dolce & Gabbana. Ancelotti worked with the Italian fashion designer group when he was at AC Milan. The Italian manager said in an interview with the Times magazine last Saturday (highlighting the new Dolce & Gabanna range for the West London team) that it was important to show a disciplined, uniformed approach especially when the club travel.
I must admit even the Drog and Lamps looked pretty good in the suits. Getting rid of Joe Cole, who has got himself sent off and missed a penalty at Liverpool, looks a stroke of genius by Anclelotti.

On the Spizzenergi front, I will be having a hospital procedure on the first day of the new season on September 3rd. It will probably take me three weeks to recover. Hopefully,
Bristol Rovers (the Gas!) will have won some games by then. Otherwise, Gashead Simon will need
some TLC. My goals this season are to score more goals (if the b*st**ds pass to me!!) and to get a discount on the match fee to reflect all of my ailments. One of them is my vet status at being 52 and a quarter years old.

Friday 13 August 2010

I am cracking under the strain of no footie!! (part two)

Dear Reader,
I thought I would be gracing the six-a-side astro pitch tonight with the guys,
who play after our slot at 7.45. However, disaster has struck. I had to powder my nose last night during the night and somehow stubbed my toe. It is not too bad but if someone steppted on it in the game I probably would be crying like a baby.

On a more serious note I will be counselling to Gashead Simon with his beloved team losing eight games on the trot if you include the last games of the last season. The 6-1 rollover to Oxford was diabolical. The expert summariser
on the BBC TV channel said the Gas's defence was all over the place.

My aims for the forthcoming season is to get more players doing their shift in goal and for Spizz to pass more rather than doing angled shots, which get you nowwhere!! Most goals come from shots made from the centre. If these aims are not fulfilled I will be giving a reduced match
fee to Gashead Simon.

Monday 9 August 2010

I am cracking under the strain of not playing footie!!

Dear Reader, I am sorry to report that I am cracking up under the strain of not playing footie on a Friday night. I have even sent a despairing email to Spizz asking if they need players this Friday. This is for the game, which normally follows us when we are not having our mid-summer break.
A couple of years ago I made myself available to their skipper and it was pretty embarrassing when he said they did not need anybody.

Is Milner really worth £30m and commisserations dear Spizz and Mick K. over the departure of
O'Neill. Perhaps his days were numbered when he invested in Heskey. Maybe, Aston Villa should start rebuilding again but I suppose it is no fun running a selling club.

Friday 23 July 2010

I have just got back from hols in Spain!

Dear Reader, the English team has a lot to do in order to reach the standards of the
Dutch, German and Spanish teams. Perhaps the best we can hope for is the Spanish team to break up with the nationalist pressures of the Catalan and the Basque regions. A former FC Barcelona president, Joan Laporta, has called for independence of Catalonia, the region provided quite a few players to Spain's winning team. However, I am sure that Brazil would not mess up with the next World Cup being on its home soil.

The actual World Cup final was a bit of a disappointment but at least the team playing the football won the game. In the first half I was kept on being asked why the English ref was not sending off Dutch players and I said he was trying to keep them on the pitch so as to avoid the game descending into farce.

Coming back to Blighty was a bit of a bore in football terms with no Spizz to track
during the summer break and with West Ham trying to put more money into the hands of
the agents.

Tuesday 29 June 2010

The last game of the season saw a fiesta of football!!

Last Friday was our last game of the season before the summer break. We reconvene in September. It was a fiesta of football with a staggering 10 versus 9. I was making up the ten and we won 5-2. I can't remember our goals since I was playing so deep and the scoring was so up the pitch that I could not see. But I did think that Gooner Simon was unlucky a couple of times for them in goal. He let one through his legs.

Big Goughie picked the sides and so on a rare occasion Spizz was selected to play with Gashead Simon.
The Bristol Rovers supporter, it can be said, is not a fan of Spizz's direct style of play, which can see little in the way of tracking back or in passing. We had key players in Tone, Stevie A, Big Sam and Alan Morg. Their defence was marshalled by Big Dave and Mick K., who both coincidentally got on the score sheet. The latter with a stroked shot from a tapped free kick. The former scored with a penalty when I did a misplaced pass across the goal to Stevie A., who trapped the ball in the penalty area.

The only negative was quite a few players on both sides did not do their stint in goal. This is a recurring problem that Gashead Simon seems unable to sort out so perhaps it is something we can resolve next season. I quite like a stint in goal since I often need a breather.

Monday 21 June 2010

I got caught in possession and we lost!!

Unfortunately, I got caught in possession by Joe and we went down to a golden goal losing
3-2. We wanted an early finish so as to watch more of the England v Algeria game but decided the game should have a winning side rather than finishing at a lame 2-2.

We had started strongly with Will scoring from my pass off the back wall. Then, somehow the ball went straight to Ross from their defence, who planted the ball in the net. We were cruising at 2-0 and then we got pegged back to 2-2 with one scored by Alan Morg. The equaliser saw a cruel bounce get past Baggies Ian in goal. I think they deserved the win since they hit the post as well.

Our defence was marshalled by Mick K. and theirs was led by Big Dave. It was eight-a-side so not too much time on the ball. I was suffering a bit with a bad knee and perhaps I should have done an extra stint in goal. Spizz played quite well for them. Our best players were Mick K. and Will, who was a handful on the right wing. The opposition was quite fluid in attack with Stevie A., Alan Morg and Spizz interchanging quite well and we were not so good at tracking back.

The England v Algeria game was a bit of a disaster but we still had to beat Slovenia to qualify. They look a tidy, neat team and we need to get our midfield working a bit better.
The newspapers today are reporting on a one-man mutiny by JT but it is obvious that Joe Cole is going to have to play. His Old Trafford flick sealed the League for Chelsea. It is no use the fans complaining about the players' wages especially when they should be having their summer break after a tough season. If New Zealand can hold Italy to a draw, then there are no
easy games. France has imploded and the Germans don't look invincible. Spain has a must-win game tonight. At least, the Argies and Brazilians look like they can play football.

Monday 14 June 2010

Last Friday saw a homage to the black arts of defending!!

I am afraid to say that last Friday saw some blatant time wasting by Tone and Spizz in goal!! We were 3-1 up and playing into the sun. There was no excuse for the dark arts of defending. Maybe we should start giving penalties against the goalie? For them, Alan Morg. hit the post twice with consecutive shots while Dave A. blasted against the post with one of his howitzers. We were on the ropes but that does not condone time wasting.

During the first half we raced to a 3-0 lead with some crisp passing and goals from Spizz, Tone and Baggies Ian. Despite some strong play by Alan Morg. Dave A. Geoff and Big Sam the opposition were unable to score during the first half. Spizz could have wrapped up the game at 4-0 but somehow chipped onto the bar. With our switch into the sun somehow our goal threat fizzled out. Tone spent more time in goal due to a slight injury problem. After I lost the ball Big Goughie slotted the ball for them from a pretty central position. Then, came the shameful time wasting.

The teams were six-a-side with me, Gashead Simon, Baggies Ian, Danny, Tone and Spizz. We could have easily lost to Big Dave, Big Sam, Alan Morg. Gooner Simon, Geoff and Goughie, who just kept hitting the post. Unfortunately, Blades Andy and Mick K. could not make it at the last moment.

This Friday the plan is to start at 6.45 so we can get in a bit of the England v Algeria game. It was a pretty terrible start against the USA with all the obvious problems rearing their ugly head. On the plus side I thought Stevie G, Lennon and Johnson did really well. It was a shame that Heskey did not take his gold-plated chance but that is the reason he does not make the Aston Villa first team. The mistake by Green was just one of those things. At least we did not lose. I remember Ray Clemence doing something similar at Spurs against one of the big Spanish teams (Barca or Real Madrid) and there was no coming back.

Tuesday 8 June 2010

Sorry about the hiatus in the blogs!!

Sorry about the hiatus in the blogs but I have had to take a bit of a break due to health reasons. However, I might be back this Friday although my fitness levels are pretty low.

Here is a recent report from Stevie A.
"The sides were picked by Blades Andy and he selected well with Gough, Will, Geoff,
Alex and me on his side. We kept it tight and Alex was a handful. He scored the first and I addes the second. Joe responded with a lovely placed goal but this was short-lived when Simon scored an own goal. We held on despite a second from Joe to
make it 3-2."

Sorry, that the great man Spizz did not make it into the report. However, I think he has had a good season overall. Soon, we will be coming to our summer break.

Tuesday 11 May 2010

I am putting Geoff up to a category B player!

Sheffield Andy remonstrated with me recently that Geoff was not as bad as I made out
and so I have upgraded him to a Category B player. Gashead Simon said the classification was a way perhaps of criticising players. That was not my intention. The aim was to avoid unfair teams being picked. The worst player on the pitch is me because of my lack of pace, the pin in my leg and the fact that I have to wear glasses. I still want a match discount!!

The last game I played in saw a recovery from 4-0 down with Alex scoring a fine
hattrick to get us back into it. Spizz was on our side but did not get a sniff in front of goal. Gashead complained latter that Mick K. often passed to Spizz when he in fact was the better opportunity. I thought the problem was that Spizz often got into space for a nice easy ball while Gashead was hemmed in by the corner but that is only my opinion.

I have been out of the game for a bit due to medical reasons. There has been a dearth of data on how the games turned out but I should get some info soon.

Tuesday 20 April 2010

Last Friday saw a tight 2-1 game!!

The sides were not evenly matched for the first period with my side having seven against Gashead's six. During this passage of play we accumulated two straightforward goals through Alex and Alan Morg. The spine of the side was quite strong with Big Dave sweeping at the back. Gashead's team had players such as Spizz, Mick K. and Big Sam. Then there was a parity of team players when Adam came on. We then had to strongly defend our two goal advantage, which was reduced when Big Sam calmly slotted home.
To run down the clock Danny the Diplomat hit the ball over the fence while Big Dave marshalled our defence. We rode our luck when Gashead's team hit the post three times including a shot from Simon Gooner.

Wednesday 14 April 2010

This is Mick K., take on his hattrick last Friday!!

"The first supplied by Evginy - we counter-attacked leaving a two on one - generously squared to demand a composed slot home. The second an exquisite ball from Tone - who held the ball up until I began a ghosted run from the right behind Gashead and co - to recent a "hot knife thru butter" pass from slightly left to feet around the pen spot - when I reversed the ball direction the goal into the left hand corner of the net with a softly weighted instep. The third - on the counter again, the ball wasl played along right which I received around half way line - remaining defence slow to move over as I advanced - drilled a low ball past keeper's feet just as a late forlorn challenge came in to knock me over - but by then the ball was gone! Good gig, wasn't it?"

Mick K.'s team ran out 5-1 winners despite a team change. I saw him at the Spizz gig and he was cock-ha-hoop about the hattrick. However, he could not understand why he did not get to keep the
match ball.

My cousin Al and I really enjoyed the gig at the King's Cross Scala. There was an eclectic audience although quite a few people wore glasses. I thought the Tracy Hunter Band were quite tuneful. We only caught a few songs of the Glitter band but
sandwhiched in between was the great man himself. Seeing Spizz live I get the impression he would be in the entertainment business whatever the decade. He is a real music hall performer!! We got to hear the Spizz classics and he even waved to me and
Mick K. in the audience.

Sunday 4 April 2010

This might sound mad but I am going to compare Spizz with Robert Plant

Dear Reader, you might think it preposterous but I am going to try and compare the
punk legend Spizz with the rock legend Robert Plant. They are both iconic figures brought up in the West Midlands area (does Worecestershire count?) and they both support local football teams. However, Spizz has had the good fortune to start supporting Aston Villa, which is the premier side in Birmingham and surrounding areas, while Plant
backs Wolverhampton Wanderers. This club is famous for its old gold shirts and where Mick McCarthy is making a pretty determined effort to keep them in the
Premier League.

Although there are major differences such as Spizz is not as tall as Plant and their
remuneration from the rock'n'roll business have been different ends of the scale,
I bet you they could each belt out a great version of "Tutti Frutti" if you asked
them to.

Could you compare "Where's Captain Kirk" with "Rock n' Roll" or "Kashmir"? Perhaps not and especially not with Plant's later stuff such as on the "Mighty Rearranger", which is brilliant. However, having been lucky enough to see Spizzenergi and Led Zeppelin, their lead vocalists both have the amazing talent of somehow taking you back in time but still sounding relevant. Spizz can still convince you that he is a punk star despite being a bit podgy. I remember Plant singing a verse from
"Are you going to San Francisco" in the middle of "Dazed and Confused" and thinking golly he was there.
Well, Spizzenergi is going to play at the Scala in London's Kings Cross on April 9th
and tickets can be obtained from outlets such as www.ticketweb.com

Unfortunately, the next bit of the blog is crass commercialism and a crude attempt to
crank up the hits. This is my unofficial review of half of the unofficial recording of "Bonzo's Birthday Party". When I heard it I thought the Led Zep gig in question was the Alexandra Palace concerts in North London, which took place in December 1972.
Now, through the Internet, I know the gig was held on May 31st, 1973 at the Inglewood Forum in southern California, United States.

I just borrowed the half, which included C and D sides, from a mate, whose brother and a friend had bought the unofficial recording at university. They decided to split up the two vinyl records. I just had "Heartbreaker, Whole Lotta Love" followed by "No Quarter",
an advert for Californian Prunes, and an encore of "The Ocean", where Plant refers back to Jimmy playing with his hand in a bowl of water to keep the swelling down
in that part of Heartbreaker. This song misses out the Jethro Tull bit and segues
into "Whole Lotta Love" after some particular loud drumming by Bonham.
The unofficial recording is taken in the crowd and the US punters don't really get the Monty Python references of Plant in his stage patter. However, the music is amazing. Even the "Crunge" works during "Whole Lotta Love" and "Boogie Mama" is great.
Even the advert for Californian Prunes is great "Still there was something about which I liked and our hearts began to sing Prunes from California!!!"

Therefore, I had great expectations when I went to see Led Zep at London's Earls Court in May 1975. Somehow, I had seen Deep Purple in Paris just before the Led Zeppelin gig
with David Coverdale singing really well. Deep Purple were a band, who could really whip up a storm.

Led Zep played for three hours and twenty minutes and there were some pretty long solos (don't like to say this, but pretty boring) with "No Quarter" and John Paul Jones, with "Moby Dick" and John Henry Bonham and with "Dazed and Confused" and Jimmy Page. Yet, I can still vividly remember every minute of the concert while Bepop Deluxe, who I saw in the Wolverhampton Civic, were brilliant but I can hardly remember the concert in detail
at all.

Led Zep came on early so loads of fans missed "Rock'n'Roll" and then we heard more of
"Houses of Holy" rather than "Physical Grafitti" than I would have liked. The fans all knew that "Kashmir" was a really great song but to last so long and for it to be
used so often on the telly is quite ironic given that Led Zeppelin did not want to be
be a "pop band". We also did not realise that Earls Court would be the last London concerts until the O2 gig. That night nearly 35 years ago stays especially in the memory for me the incredible encores of "Whole Lotta Love" (shortened version) and "Black Dog".

Was Led Zeppelin, Earls Court, May 1975 the best concert I ever saw? Maybe that is a question for another post!!

Thursday 1 April 2010

Redacted letter to one of the "kick me upstairs" gang!!

What follows ia a redacted letter to one of the guys, who is part of the "kick me upstairs" gang.


Dear *******,
I remember watching games where my ******* when he was playing for QPR youth team
and I did not remember El Tel and George Graham wearing sheepskins. However, I am quite happy to borrow the sheepskin coat but will it fit? I refer to this in my two part blog for the latest match result and with details of the Spizzenergi concert
at the Scala in Kings Cross on April 9th. [There is a plot trying to push me upstairs into a managerial role). Youth team football was a quite heartbreaking environment. The coaches would not hesitate in yanking kids off before half-time in they were not playing well (probably destroying their careers and at least
denting their confidence).

As for Italian defending I once saw AC Milan play Chelsea at the Bridge and saw the great Maldini and Costacurta go through their repertoire of flicks, amazing passes as well as nudges and sly fouls. While at the same time they made sure that their hair was not a strand out of place because of they were concerned about their modelling
commitments. I saw the unbelievable thing of Maldini doing a brilliant curved pass down the touchline on his wrong foot despite the fact that he always passed the ball with his left foot. Or was it the other way round?

Big Dave can do the same repertoire of nudges and pushes. He can also simply
ploughs through you lie he did last night. You must put your hand up for a foul. We are not the Corinthians! I still can't understand how Big Dave claimed he was going for the ball when he took away my standing leg and landed in a heap on the
pitch. This was not very elegant.

As for me picking the teams players the guys would have to endure a rant about people not doing their shift in goal. Then, I would remind certain people that football can be a simple passing game. Deep down I am pretty unsympathetic about players, who are unable to make the straightforward pass to the nearest, unmarked guy. I know it is difficult for Gashead Simon not to pass to Tone, since they were at school together but when Tone is surrounded by two or three players. That is probably the real reason why Gashead Simon is a B lister rather than
an A.

Look at Man Utd, they are just getting the ball to the wing with Valencia and Nani, the cross comes over and there are Rooney, Berbatov, Fletcher and Park at the business end of it. You can fall asleep watching the intricate play of Arsenal, an Arsene Wenger strategy of "how not to win the Premier League and the European Champions League". This is despite always playing with eleven players, who are supremely confident on the
ball.

The only time I have been to the Emirates was when Arsenal outplayed West Ham but the Hammers went away with a one-nil victory. This was courtesy of Zamora getting onto the end of a long ball while Tevez played an amazing one man attacking show taking up four defenders in the second half.

Your affectionate *******

PS. This redacted letter was written after the Euro games on Tuesday and Wednesday. Man Utd still have a chance despite Rooney being injured but I fear Arsenal are going out. This is despite a massive comeback after being played off the
park for the first hour.

Saturday 27 March 2010

First of two part blog:Spizz picks the teams on Friday night

Punk star Spizz, who has promised me a sensational half-hour set supporting The Glitter Band on April 9th at London King Cross venue Scala, picked the teams last night. Unfortunately, his team floundered to a 5-2 defeat. The game was memorable for an uncontested penalty (the ball clearly hit Tone in the D) while Spizz's team was hit by an uncharacteristic poor performance
from young Sam for them.

Our team just gelled from the off with the two holding
players of Tone and Stevo. Our attackers Joe, Ross and Will began running in great positions confident that Tone would pick them out with some great passes. Stevo swept
up everthing in defence while I swore that Lardy Ian was actually playing box-to-box for us. Tone got the first goal for us with possibly a speculative shot, which was deflected (Big Dave?). Spizz's team did not get on the score sheet for ages and the match might have had a different outcome if the Spizz shot, which beat me all ends up
(not difficult) and hit the post, had actually gone in.
Alan Morg. got in a rare right-footed goal while Big Dave slotted the penalty for them. I think but can't remember that Tone got another goal while Stevo marked one on
the score sheet. The goal that broke their hearts came at the 4-2 stage, which was taken really well by Ross.

Advanced tickets for the gig are £11.50 and are available at sites such as ticketweb.com and flagpromotions.com while the other support acts are Angie Bowie and Tracie Hunter Band.

Spizzenergi are not mentioned on the electronic flyer on the ticketweb site but they are on the physical, laminated flyer in front of me.
The Flagpromotions.com site has Spizzenergi on the e-flyer.

Two part blog and Spizz promises blistering set!!

This is going to be a two part blog and Spizz has promised me a blistering half-hour set
in the Spizzenergi support act for the Glitter Band on April 9th at London's Scala venue in Kings Cross. I am going despite being on a Friday night and missing my beloved footie. After the recent candid blog about classifications, which may be misconstrued as a polite way of saying to a guy, "you can't cut the mustard playing
football". Some of the boys have got their own back by suggesting that I move upstairs to being manager. Not even transitioning to being a "player manager", straight to
manager. I am staring at retirement in the face!!

Tickets for the gig, headliners the Glitter band, other support acts Angie Bowie and
tracie hunter band are available at sites such as ticketweb.co.uk at the advance price of £11.50. Spizzenergi are not mentioned on the electronic flyer on this site but are on the physical, laminated flyer in front of me.
Flagpromotions.com has the up-to-date e-flyer on its site.

Wednesday 24 March 2010

Stop press:I am not being rotated this Friday!!

Yesterday, I pushed the boat out and Gashead Simon received some fine wining and dining in south Hertfordshire. The upshot is that I am not being rotated this Friday!!
OK, the Bristol Rovers fan just had a beer and fish & chips. On the previous blog I should have put myself down as B/C as I am quite good at zonal defence while Spizz is A/B because he often scores some very good goals.

Monday 22 March 2010

Gashead's team cruise to 5-1 victory on Friday!! Classification of players!!

Despite my illness and the sorry state of the railway service I made it to watch the game on Friday night. When I eventually arrived after the start it was a close 1-1 draw but then it turned into a rout with Gashead's team cruising to a 5-1 victory. Gashead picked all the players he liked for his team such as Tone, Yev, Big Sam and Alan Morg, who are quite quick and good passers of the ball and then stuffed the opposition team with all the players he does not like such as Simon Ink., Geoff and perhaps the great man himself Spizz . These players don't like passing or can't pass. The opposition also had Alex, who is the best player on the field skillwise but again can't pass. It was Alex and Big Dave, who kept the opposition in it for so long.

There was one opportunity when Simon Ink. just had to backheel a freekick to Big Dave, who is famous for his powerhouse shots but Ink. lamely passed it to someone else, who was already marked. Ink. was oblivious to Dave's screams for the ball, possibly his ears were still affected by his recent trip to the Himalayas.

A few times Spizz was in so much room on the left it was embarrassing but he did he get the ball, well of course not. I would suggest a more mathematical or equation based
formula to selecting the teams. Players would be graded A, B and C and then we would have Venn diagram-based selection for the two teams. The A category players would be
Alex, Big Dave, his brother Stevo, Tone, Big Sam, Alan Morg. Mick K., Yev and Ross.
These are players, who can make things happen, who can produce.

Then, the B category are good players, who can pass the simple ball such as Gashead Simon, Doha Danny, Joe and Gooner Simon. Spizz and Henry are good players and are very useful attack-wise but let themselves down by not running back and by not passing.
Big Ian has more lard than you can imagine but he still has a turn of space from representing his school at county level in running. West Bromwich Ian has a good all-round game, quite good in goal but often shoots from too far out where his conversion rate of shots to goals is normally zero.

The C category include myself due to age, ailments and lack of fitness. Simon Ink. is a good dribbler, good in goal but is not a great passer, more head-down. Then there is Geoff, who is often late arriving for the game and is very inconsistent. He can either score a hat trick but nornally he can take absolutely ages in distributing the ball. Historically, Geoff never passes to me except during the last game I played in January when I fell over in shock. On the plus side he also one of the best goalkeepers with Big Dave and Gashead Simon.

Sheffield Andy's best position is also in goal or in central defence as a blocker because he has long limbs and is quite big. However, he often insists on hugging the touchline upfront, which is probably the wrong strategy in seven-a-side football.

The four best players are Big Dave, Mick K., Alex and Tone. Big Dave is also very proficient in Italian-style defending. Tone leads the vets (over 50s), which include
me, the oldest, Spizz and Simon. Alex Morg. is very good but only has one foot while
Ross is exceptional dribbling and shooting but is not one to track back. Yev has a killer instinct in front of goal, is very pacey but you could die of boredom, if you are waiting for a simple pass from him.

So last Friday's game was seven a side and Gashead Simon picked four A category players and three Bs for his side. Then, there were two As, three Bs and two Cs for the opposition, so no wonder they were eventually slaughtered. I was available for selection before a bout of chemo but apparently I am being rotated. It would have been a far tighter game if Big Sam had swapped over for Geoff or Simon Ink.

On a more sentimental note Simon Ink's girlfriend was still waiting for him even after his two month plus sabbatical in the Far East and Australia, which was quite romantic in this day and age. This contrasts with my position at the moment where the missus is giving me the ache.

Tuesday 16 March 2010

Spizz goes down in 2-0 defeat!!

Punk star Spizz went down in a two nil defeat last time. Apparently, he did not have his passing boots on according to jaundiced team mates. It was a case of the codgers versus the youngsters, which is always a recipe for disaster. There was not much time on the ball with eight a side.

I thought about going to watch or maybe being a referee. However, I would probably opt to play in goal, which would not do much for my fragile confidence. This is especially when I will get the inevitable brickbats after picking the ball out of the net.

On the wider footballing front I was saddened by Phil Brown going on gardening leave. I knew it would go pear shaped when he hinted at wider managerial ambitions in a television interview (hubris?) when Hull had that great start and were beating Arsenal at the Emirates. He did not realise he was just lucky enough to manage a Premier League team. Look at the number of managers, who have got the experience to handle the Premier League and are not doing so such as Hughes, Strachan, Curbs, Coppell and Megson.

Thursday 11 March 2010

Sorry to register a lack of match reports!!

Dear Reader, I am sorry to register a lack of match reports. Nobody seems to want to send them or perhaps the games are too boring to share with you. Anyway, Spizz is
supporting the Glitter Band in April and he has been assured that Gary won't be there. I have to admit that Spizz was excellent when we saw him perform in the 100 Club last year, so there is life in the old dog yet.
As for today I am surprised that it has not been declared a national day of celebration following the elimination of Real Madrid by Lyon from the Champions League last night. My team Man Utd put AC Milan to the sword; well, Wayne did. Even the Gooners cruised through to the next round. I was having recurring nightmares that Ronaldo would line up for his third consecutive European Cup Final at the home ground of Santiago Bernabeu and thankfully this will not happen.
Years ago I was lucky enough to watch Nottingham Forest's rearguard action against Hamburg with Shilton and Burns absolutely amazing. Poor old Kevin Keegan trudged off defeated. That took place in Santiago Bernabeu.

Monday 1 March 2010

Sorry to be behind on the match reports!!

This is the report for the previous Friday from SteveA.

The initial selection favoured a Simon win so the sides were changed at 2-0 down. Big Davie swapped with Simon Redhead to join the Bibs composed of Spizz, Henry, SteveA, Ian Geary, Andrew and Joe. With the sides more balanced it was the Bibs against Simon and we crawled back to finally losing 4-3. On the whole, the Bibs were wayward in their shooting and only created chances when there was a patient build up of passing and movement off the ball.
www.spizzenergi.com
I will leave the rest to your imagination!
The Guv'nor comments:
In fairness to Simon Gashead, it is difficult to pick balanced sides. There are the vagaries of form and it is rare for a team to come back from 2-0 down. Rather than
knuckle down and try to mount a fight back, it is easier to make a slight
change.

Thursday 18 February 2010

This was Geoff's take on last Friday's match.

A very tight 16 man game on Friday night and my team won 1-0 with Joe scoring the rebound from Big Dave's shot. A very tense game with a few hefty challenges, firm but fair. I played on at 7.45 and it was much less intense. Simon had another great game. Steve Aiton played a blinder for the other team. Not sure the sides were fair though.
www.spizzenergi.com
I am still struggling for fitness. As for the Gooners last night in Oporto, just pure comedy. Just what their legions of fans need.

Friday 12 February 2010

Steve's team went down 3-1

I did a telephone interview with Steve and he said his team went down 3-1. Apparently, it did not gel up front. Steve assured me that he did not clatter into anybody, which is part of his repertoire. Gashead was on the winning side after picking the teams (again?) and Alan Morg. got two good goals.
On the wider football front Pompey are still with us. It looks like HMRC has been very lenient with football clubs in the past and now it is baring its teeth.
No further news about Spizz's possible World Cup song for South Africa. I suppose the key part for a football anthem is the chorus.

Friday 5 February 2010

Spizz will be providing the next match report!!

Punk star Spizz will be providing the match report for tonight's game. However, I think the whole of world football has been overshadowed by the sacking of John Terry as England captain and by the comments of Tzofit Grant.
From what I can gather time speaking the alleged flings of Vanessa P. with Chelsea squad members coincided with the London team winning the league championship
two years running. Maybe, if some of our Friday-night players cavorted with French lingerie models then the football might improve.
Apparently, Tzofit says her husband Avram Grant can do anything he wants with his body. One of Tzofit's claims to fame, other than being married to a useless football manager, is that she was spanked by a sadomasochist in connection with her Israeli TV programme.

Tuesday 2 February 2010

Spizz to record World Cup song for 2010?

Appparently, there is a Facebook campaign to get Spizz to record another song for the World Cup campaign of England.
http://www.facebook.com/posted.php?id=268994338206
I wish there was a Facebook campaign for Spizz to wear his shooting boots because they were missing last Friday. However, the old boy did look pretty solid during his spell in goal.
It was a 1-1 draw with Ross scoring for us followed by a dramatic long-range shot from Big Dave to equalise. I had a poor game being out of sorts with my knee hurting and with me being sidelined from the game for the next few weeks. I asked a few of the guys to provide the reports and I would paste them up. However, everybody is too busy.
After not being passed to a few times, I moved from right back to take a very advanced position in the left-wing corner. Sometimes I kept warm by trying to clip at the heels of Big Dave. We were eight against their seven and it was disappointing that we did not take advantage of the extra man to register a win. Sheffield Andy had a strong game for us in defence while I thought Steve was very effective in midfield for them.

Monday 25 January 2010

Last Friday sees titanic struggle end 5-4 to Spizz's team!

Last Friday night was the first game of the New Year and ended 5-4 to Spizz's team. Simon Gooner had initially picked the sides, which were rejigged when Big Sam came on late. It was eight-a-side with team A having the experienced defenders big Dave, Mick K. and Big Sam while Danny the Diplomat sacrificed his attacking inclinations to stay back. Team A was augmented by Big Dave's brother Steve, Sheffield Andy, Ian and Spizz.
Team B had an attacking trident of Alex, Tone and Ross with Gashead and Joe playing on the left side. Goughie, me and Simon Gooner made up the eight.
We initially raced to a two nil lead with goals from Ross and Alex. Then, Big Sam made me lose concentration by pointing to the size of my post Xmas gut and then turned me finishing off with a low shot in the bottom corner. Team A then played a classic counter-attacking game with further goals by Mick K., Steve, Spizz and Sheffield Andy. We tried to get back into it with two goals from Tone, one a penalty, but to no avail.
I tried to explain to Spizz that his goal was more of the goalkeeper handling it into his own net but he was having none of it. He claimed the ball did not change direction and without action replay technology we were none the wiser.
Team A deserved to win but there was controversy over four penalty decisions. I rushed out of goal when Big Dave was storming through (where was the defence?) because I thought Joe had replaced me. However, he was hobbling into the D with an ankle injury. Sportingly, Team A were convinced not to press for a penalty although Big Dave had his misgivings. We then got two penalty decisions with one missed by Alex and then there was a strong appeal for another but the ball rolled out of the D after not being picked up by the goalie after a direct pass-back.
Alex and Tone played well for us but too often their defence was more organised and more resolute than we bargained for.
PS. Spizz has recently appeared on national TV!

"News 24 / You tube spizz
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQMbsCvrII8

Friday 15 January 2010

We are really missing the footie!!

What with Christmas Day and New Year's Day falling on a Friday and the additional cancellation of three games due to bad weather, we have'nt had a run-out for five weeks. Maybe the leisure centre should invest in undersoil heating!! I have been just itching to play after my dramatic goal in our last match.
My New Year Resolutions of giving up alcohol and improving my fitness have already gone for a burton. I won't be able to match Spizz, who has made great strides in his fitness over the last couple of years. He also has quite a bit of pace over the first two yards, which you need when you are leading the attack. Spizz is not quite as quick as Ross, who has really improved and is now a definite goal threat.