The Guvnor is taking advantage of a Sheffield Andy e-mail for an early match report.
"Yes I played on Friday. We should have won but it turned into a 3 all draw. Simon's decision to put Yev in defence for the first 15 mins kept our goal scoring abilities to a minimum. Spizz turned up to the pub wanting beer. He looked like Alvin Stardust in his pomp."
Gooner Simon will also provide a match report. But I sincerely hope that it is not the travelogue we got last time. For technical reasons the longer match report from the young Gooner (well he is younger than me!!)
comes before this particular blog.
Best regards, the Guvnor.PS> My link should really be Stratford Hotspur rather than Tottenham Hotspur!! Never mind come on you Spurs and who gives a monkeys for an Olympic legacy!!
Monday, 7 February 2011
Noms de football
Excuse the poncy title for this blog – I am under instructions from Paul to keep you all as anonymous as possible, hence noms de football… think of them like noms de guerre but without the shooting, to misquote George Orwell.
So, last Friday’s game then. Simon I (that’s his second name initial – he isn’t King of anything, so far as I am aware) opened the scoring in a lively 3-3 draw. Simon I is the Simon who isn’t Simon Gashead, or me. What you might label a dirty finish, scuffing one into the bottom right corner, but they all count. Ian West Brom then entered the fray, making it seven aside. With Yev playing in an unaccustomed defensive role the team in colours continued to press for a second, with Alex and Will causing plenty of problems for the team in bibs. Following an excruciating bash on the toe I relieved Simon Gashead in goal and with a depressing predictability quickly saw the game turn on its head as Ross finished from close range to equalise, followed by a long range effort from Alan to make it 2-1.
Alex stroked in at the other end to make it two apiece, before the bibs went back into the lead. With time ticking away some elegant passing lead to Will side footing what proved to be the final goal in an absorbing contest to level the scores at 3-3. There was a suspicion of one of Will’s feet being just inside the area as that goal went in, but there was little (if any) protest from the bibs and the goal stood.
Joe then went down with a recurrence of an old ligament injury, but despite being a man short the team in bibs defended resolutely and the side in colours could not find a winner, even with Yev returning to his traditional berth up front. Honours even, which I think all would agree was a fair result on the balance of play.
And so to the pub, where the post match hoi polloi fell into two camps: those watching the egg chasing from Cardiff and those who were not. At around 9.00 pm none other than Spizz himself came in, sporting a biker’s jacket and a shock of very black hair. That, I think all would concur, is a confirmed sighting of the legendary post-punk figure.
So, last Friday’s game then. Simon I (that’s his second name initial – he isn’t King of anything, so far as I am aware) opened the scoring in a lively 3-3 draw. Simon I is the Simon who isn’t Simon Gashead, or me. What you might label a dirty finish, scuffing one into the bottom right corner, but they all count. Ian West Brom then entered the fray, making it seven aside. With Yev playing in an unaccustomed defensive role the team in colours continued to press for a second, with Alex and Will causing plenty of problems for the team in bibs. Following an excruciating bash on the toe I relieved Simon Gashead in goal and with a depressing predictability quickly saw the game turn on its head as Ross finished from close range to equalise, followed by a long range effort from Alan to make it 2-1.
Alex stroked in at the other end to make it two apiece, before the bibs went back into the lead. With time ticking away some elegant passing lead to Will side footing what proved to be the final goal in an absorbing contest to level the scores at 3-3. There was a suspicion of one of Will’s feet being just inside the area as that goal went in, but there was little (if any) protest from the bibs and the goal stood.
Joe then went down with a recurrence of an old ligament injury, but despite being a man short the team in bibs defended resolutely and the side in colours could not find a winner, even with Yev returning to his traditional berth up front. Honours even, which I think all would agree was a fair result on the balance of play.
And so to the pub, where the post match hoi polloi fell into two camps: those watching the egg chasing from Cardiff and those who were not. At around 9.00 pm none other than Spizz himself came in, sporting a biker’s jacket and a shock of very black hair. That, I think all would concur, is a confirmed sighting of the legendary post-punk figure.
Tuesday, 1 February 2011
Those girls from Birmingham, Alabama really sprinted out of the pub!!
On Friday, all the qualities of the beautiful English game were on display,from the pretty grueseome performance on the pitch to the raucous post-match party, which took place in the Fountain. Obviously, we missed Spizz,
who always bring a bit of colour to events with his brightly coloured yellow hair.
So making fun in the Fountain is often a pretty low-key affair but last Friday I had a pretty hazy memory of Big Ian G. giving me a big bear hug welcoming back the Guvnor of old to
true form.
I have to admit it was pretty much my fault that the quiet post-match drinks turned into a complete drunken spree, and pretty whiskey filled at that!!! This was due to the extraodinary generosity of Mick K. and Yev, who kept the rounds coming even when the others had run out of money.
Sometimes, (birthdays and highdays), I buy a complete round of drams to celebrate. I am looking at 53. My hair is falling out and I can't run and hack that Keir down like I want to.
But I got some plaudits for my steady play last Friday. So I wanted to buy everybody drinks (I must be mad, the drugs of choice at the moment are sodium valporate and olanzapine). However, I had run out of money. Gashead Simon refused to give me a loan (is that a junk credit rating or what!!) and then run out of the pub. However, Mick K. and Yev stepped in and bought the drinks.
Then, suddenly Steve A. was doing full blast the "Ode to the Haggis" and then singing the "Flower of Scotland". What was more amazing was that the old sassenach Ian G. knew all the words.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/robertburns/works/address_to_a_haggis/
The other young people in the pub studiously ignored us, when we were standing up singing Scottish chants, songs and poems at top volume. Big Sam was putting in a heroic performance. He had played footie straight sfter arriving from New York and after spending a night at JFK. Big Sam was getting stuck into the drinks and so he is a true athlete in every way.
There were two girls sitting on their own next to our mob. So Yev put on
his "I LIKE GIRLZ AND I AM AN INVESTMENT BANKER" smile and charged in.
Mick K. (a bit diffidently), went up to
say hi.
The less pretty one was all smiles but soon the pretty one's face was registering shock and horror. The girls were U.S citizens, who came from Birmingham, Alabama.
Mick K. could not understand why they had'nt gone to see the Villa in the UK's second city but went to terrible places such as Brighton. (The Holte End is not the centre of the universe Mick!)
Anyway, our lads, being the gentlemen they are, politely withdrew. Soon afterwards the Birmingham, Alabama girls fairly sprinted out of the pub. They were so fast I thought about signing them for our team!!
You simply had to be there because it was a pure comedy moment. Steve A. and I just collapsed in giggles. I suddenly thought of all the boys in the team, who had missed it and somehow I thought of Shakespeare:
Be in their flowing cups freshly remember'd.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remember'd;
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition:
And gentlemen in England now a-bed
Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,
Alright the pub was no way a battle scene but I quite like the words and here is a toast to "Sweet Home Alabama"!!!
who always bring a bit of colour to events with his brightly coloured yellow hair.
So making fun in the Fountain is often a pretty low-key affair but last Friday I had a pretty hazy memory of Big Ian G. giving me a big bear hug welcoming back the Guvnor of old to
true form.
I have to admit it was pretty much my fault that the quiet post-match drinks turned into a complete drunken spree, and pretty whiskey filled at that!!! This was due to the extraodinary generosity of Mick K. and Yev, who kept the rounds coming even when the others had run out of money.
Sometimes, (birthdays and highdays), I buy a complete round of drams to celebrate. I am looking at 53. My hair is falling out and I can't run and hack that Keir down like I want to.
But I got some plaudits for my steady play last Friday. So I wanted to buy everybody drinks (I must be mad, the drugs of choice at the moment are sodium valporate and olanzapine). However, I had run out of money. Gashead Simon refused to give me a loan (is that a junk credit rating or what!!) and then run out of the pub. However, Mick K. and Yev stepped in and bought the drinks.
Then, suddenly Steve A. was doing full blast the "Ode to the Haggis" and then singing the "Flower of Scotland". What was more amazing was that the old sassenach Ian G. knew all the words.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/robertburns/works/address_to_a_haggis/
The other young people in the pub studiously ignored us, when we were standing up singing Scottish chants, songs and poems at top volume. Big Sam was putting in a heroic performance. He had played footie straight sfter arriving from New York and after spending a night at JFK. Big Sam was getting stuck into the drinks and so he is a true athlete in every way.
There were two girls sitting on their own next to our mob. So Yev put on
his "I LIKE GIRLZ AND I AM AN INVESTMENT BANKER" smile and charged in.
Mick K. (a bit diffidently), went up to
say hi.
The less pretty one was all smiles but soon the pretty one's face was registering shock and horror. The girls were U.S citizens, who came from Birmingham, Alabama.
Mick K. could not understand why they had'nt gone to see the Villa in the UK's second city but went to terrible places such as Brighton. (The Holte End is not the centre of the universe Mick!)
Anyway, our lads, being the gentlemen they are, politely withdrew. Soon afterwards the Birmingham, Alabama girls fairly sprinted out of the pub. They were so fast I thought about signing them for our team!!
You simply had to be there because it was a pure comedy moment. Steve A. and I just collapsed in giggles. I suddenly thought of all the boys in the team, who had missed it and somehow I thought of Shakespeare:
Be in their flowing cups freshly remember'd.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remember'd;
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition:
And gentlemen in England now a-bed
Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,
Alright the pub was no way a battle scene but I quite like the words and here is a toast to "Sweet Home Alabama"!!!
Return to Action…Yev converts three out of six chances
Firstly, I’d like to say what an incredible honour it is to be asked to write a Blog entry for the legendary Spizz Forever website. I can only hope to maintain the high standards set by the Guvnor over the years, although I won’t be following Joe’s example and heading into verse. The only poem I know starts ‘There was a young lady from Ealing’…
Last Friday marked my return to the Friday night football fray after a post-Christmas hiatus following my recent trip to the Antipodes see the Urn return home to England. And what had changed? Well, I was in a little worse shape than I thought, something only exacerbated by Joe giving me the fluorescent boobtube to wear. Dave A. was still crocked, but manfully deciding to forgo medical advice and play in goal. Anything else? Yes, dear reader: Boro Dave is back.
I was grateful for the high turn out as after a Christmas period spent eating mince pies and goose followed by three weeks of sun and beer I didn’t fancy running around too much. The fact there were 18 people on the pitch didn’t seem to hamper what I thought was a decent game, however. With Keir in his now customary spot opposite Alex in central midfield and the prodigal Smoggie on the opposing team to the key striker, Yev, both teams looked well balanced. A combination of typically resolute Aiton defending from Dave and Steve and a barnstorming display from Alex was enough to win the game for the team in colours, although had Boro Dave been back a few more weeks his finishing would have been more clinical. He’s looking good for the business end of the season.
The score was 2-1 to the team in colours up until the final few minutes when a Yev strike took a deflection and left yours truly wrong footed. New year, same poor goalkeeping from me.
And, at 3-1, that was that…
I’m intrigued to hear more about ‘Sweet Home Alabama’; when I left the Fountain’s Head Steve A was regaling the pub with his best Rabbie Burns rendition. In the words of David Coleman, what happened next?
PS: Spizz is still retired.
Last Friday marked my return to the Friday night football fray after a post-Christmas hiatus following my recent trip to the Antipodes see the Urn return home to England. And what had changed? Well, I was in a little worse shape than I thought, something only exacerbated by Joe giving me the fluorescent boobtube to wear. Dave A. was still crocked, but manfully deciding to forgo medical advice and play in goal. Anything else? Yes, dear reader: Boro Dave is back.
I was grateful for the high turn out as after a Christmas period spent eating mince pies and goose followed by three weeks of sun and beer I didn’t fancy running around too much. The fact there were 18 people on the pitch didn’t seem to hamper what I thought was a decent game, however. With Keir in his now customary spot opposite Alex in central midfield and the prodigal Smoggie on the opposing team to the key striker, Yev, both teams looked well balanced. A combination of typically resolute Aiton defending from Dave and Steve and a barnstorming display from Alex was enough to win the game for the team in colours, although had Boro Dave been back a few more weeks his finishing would have been more clinical. He’s looking good for the business end of the season.
The score was 2-1 to the team in colours up until the final few minutes when a Yev strike took a deflection and left yours truly wrong footed. New year, same poor goalkeeping from me.
And, at 3-1, that was that…
I’m intrigued to hear more about ‘Sweet Home Alabama’; when I left the Fountain’s Head Steve A was regaling the pub with his best Rabbie Burns rendition. In the words of David Coleman, what happened next?
PS: Spizz is still retired.
Saturday, 29 January 2011
Three blogs to come about last night's extraordinary night!
A match report from Gooner Simon, a critique of the losing team and "Sweet Home Alabama".
Missing poor old Spizz was still absent
but might come back according to rumours.
Missing poor old Spizz was still absent
but might come back according to rumours.
Tuesday, 25 January 2011
I missed a sitter last week!!
Last week I missed a sitter, which could have earned us a creditable 5-5 draw. We had
eight versus seven. Their main defensive trio had a combined age of around 150 being challenged by three players totalling 99 years. I was a bit of the pace after a long
lay-off. Apparently, Spizz is still retired.
For us Alex led the play while Stevie A. and little Sam were the stars of the show for them. Gashead Simon tried to rate himself at six and then give six-a-half for Stevie A, who scored two goals. Unfortunately, I was in goal for three of their goals.
I can't remembering Alex and Ross doing their stint in goal but I could be corrected on this. For them Big Dave A. had a sore ankle and a new player Matt, who was later injured, shared the goalkeeping duties. I thought Big Ian was quite good in midfield
for them while Boro Dave did some mazy dribbles and flicks as well as scoring a neat
goal.
I am going to have to work on my fitness and wear something bright orange so that the boys can see me in terms of passing to me. Even though we had the extra man, Big Dave said in the pub that we were pretty disorganised.
eight versus seven. Their main defensive trio had a combined age of around 150 being challenged by three players totalling 99 years. I was a bit of the pace after a long
lay-off. Apparently, Spizz is still retired.
For us Alex led the play while Stevie A. and little Sam were the stars of the show for them. Gashead Simon tried to rate himself at six and then give six-a-half for Stevie A, who scored two goals. Unfortunately, I was in goal for three of their goals.
I can't remembering Alex and Ross doing their stint in goal but I could be corrected on this. For them Big Dave A. had a sore ankle and a new player Matt, who was later injured, shared the goalkeeping duties. I thought Big Ian was quite good in midfield
for them while Boro Dave did some mazy dribbles and flicks as well as scoring a neat
goal.
I am going to have to work on my fitness and wear something bright orange so that the boys can see me in terms of passing to me. Even though we had the extra man, Big Dave said in the pub that we were pretty disorganised.
Wednesday, 19 January 2011
I have been hit by injury!!
Sorry for the lack of blogs but I have been hit by injury!!
Gashead Simon is also a bit like Bill Shankley, who famously never
talked to injured players. So I am not getting any TLC from the
manager.
So I have missed Spizz for the year
so far. I have especially missed his insight into the trials and tribulations of Aston Villa. That is not exactly true because he is a Villa fan through and
through whatever cruel fate throws at the club. It will be interesting
to see if Darren Bent is the answer to the problem.
Gashead Simon is also a bit like Bill Shankley, who famously never
talked to injured players. So I am not getting any TLC from the
manager.
So I have missed Spizz for the year
so far. I have especially missed his insight into the trials and tribulations of Aston Villa. That is not exactly true because he is a Villa fan through and
through whatever cruel fate throws at the club. It will be interesting
to see if Darren Bent is the answer to the problem.
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