This post comes entirely from hearsay in the pub!!

Dear Readers, this post comes entirely from hearsay in the pub because last
Friday (June 12th, 2011) I went to Westminster Cathedral to the ordination of
five former Anglican vicars to the Ordinariate. This is a special ministry invented
by the current Pope, Benedict, otherwise known as the Panzerkardinal. This ministry
allows Anglican vicars, even if they are married, to be fast-tracked into the
Roman Catholic Church. This is despite the tinsy-weensy problem that the Universal
Church exacts a rule of celibacy from normal Catholic priests. Did I say normal?
I should have said real Catholic priests.

In any event, the two hour service started at 5.30pm so no way could I get to the game but I could amble along to the pub to get the post-mortem. The game ended
4-3 after the winning team was losing 1-3 at one stage. Apparently, there was
a bit of hand-bags between Big Dave and Boro Dave (the clash of the Daves).
If I was there I could have put my conflict resolution skills to good use
(I have not really got any!!). I don't even know if Spizz played or not.

I hope to play tonight (I have'nt been rotated yet!!) and I hope to get a three quid
discount on a) my bipolar disorder, b) my cancer, c)nobody passes to me and d)
a small honorarium for doing the blogs, although I would share the specific element
of the discount with Gooner Simon, who does excellent blogs.

Next week is our last game before the summer break and I think we are going to
some new American burger joint in Hoxton, which will be a change. Usually for
any end-of-season meals we tend to go to a curry and then complain it was a load of rubbish.

Return to Action…Yev converts three out of six chances

Firstly, I’d like to say what an incredible honour it is to be asked to write a Blog entry for the legendary Spizz Forever website. I can only hope to maintain the high standards set by the Guvnor over the years, although I won’t be following Joe’s example and heading into verse. The only poem I know starts ‘There was a young lady from Ealing’…

Last Friday marked my return to the Friday night football fray after a post-Christmas hiatus following my recent trip to the Antipodes see the Urn return home to England. And what had changed? Well, I was in a little worse shape than I thought, something only exacerbated by Joe giving me the fluorescent boobtube to wear. Dave A. was still crocked, but manfully deciding to forgo medical advice and play in goal. Anything else? Yes, dear reader: Boro Dave is back.

I was grateful for the high turn out as after a Christmas period spent eating mince pies and goose followed by three weeks of sun and beer I didn’t fancy running around too much. The fact there were 18 people on the pitch didn’t seem to hamper what I thought was a decent game, however. With Keir in his now customary spot opposite Alex in central midfield and the prodigal Smoggie on the opposing team to the key striker, Yev, both teams looked well balanced. A combination of typically resolute Aiton defending from Dave and Steve and a barnstorming display from Alex was enough to win the game for the team in colours, although had Boro Dave been back a few more weeks his finishing would have been more clinical. He’s looking good for the business end of the season.

The score was 2-1 to the team in colours up until the final few minutes when a Yev strike took a deflection and left yours truly wrong footed. New year, same poor goalkeeping from me.

And, at 3-1, that was that…

I’m intrigued to hear more about ‘Sweet Home Alabama’; when I left the Fountain’s Head Steve A was regaling the pub with his best Rabbie Burns rendition. In the words of David Coleman, what happened next?

PS: Spizz is still retired.

I missed a sitter last week!!

Last week I missed a sitter, which could have earned us a creditable 5-5 draw. We had
eight versus seven. Their main defensive trio had a combined age of around 150 being challenged by three players totalling 99 years. I was a bit of the pace after a long
lay-off. Apparently, Spizz is still retired.

For us Alex led the play while Stevie A. and little Sam were the stars of the show for them. Gashead Simon tried to rate himself at six and then give six-a-half for Stevie A, who scored two goals. Unfortunately, I was in goal for three of their goals.

I can't remembering Alex and Ross doing their stint in goal but I could be corrected on this. For them Big Dave A. had a sore ankle and a new player Matt, who was later injured, shared the goalkeeping duties. I thought Big Ian was quite good in midfield
for them while Boro Dave did some mazy dribbles and flicks as well as scoring a neat
goal.

I am going to have to work on my fitness and wear something bright orange so that the boys can see me in terms of passing to me. Even though we had the extra man, Big Dave said in the pub that we were pretty disorganised.

Arsenal Simon, the one and only!!

I thought I would devote this blog to profiling Arsenal Simon. We also have another
Simon playing with us, who actually arranges the booking on Friday nights and who I call for the purpose of the blog Gashead Simon, because he is a Gashead (Rovers!!).
Apparently, the Cheltenham groundshare has collapsed and it is back to Bristle.

At the last pub meet before our midsummer meet, Arsenal Simon seemed slightly perplexed that I wrote a blog about the Friday night game and about the performance
(football wise) of Mr Spizz. So I thought
I would share my thoughts about Arsenal Simon with all my readers. I know you are out there because the Google report shows some hits.

The very positive atributes:
1) Arsenal Simon is prepared to buy you a drink in the pub when the round system has collapsed/or you have run out of money. So he is a true gentleman.
2) Arsenal Simon plays the game how it should be played. Triangles, push and move are not alien to him unlike the other bastards. OK, he passes even to me, even though
I am well-known for falling over or for passing it back to the opposition.
3) Arsenal Simon wears an away kit of those money grubbing crew, which I can just about tolerate, rather than the home kit. This is since I am a part time Spurs supporter, even though I might have a mindset of just remembering Pat Jennings,
Sol Campbell (why did they go to Arsenal?)
4) I have never seen Arsenal Simon foul anybody. This is unlike some who specialise in the black arts (step forward Big Dave and Boro Dave!!)

The very negative attributes
1) Arsenal Simon should score more goals. He hits the post alot. I think he has watched the Gunners too many times. At our level you don't have to place the ball an inch inside the post. You can poke it towards the goalie, who percentage wise is likely to either miss the ball completely or help it on its way. Especially, if I am
in goal. One of my unforced errors led to Boro Dave, letting loose some invective.
Big Dave said during the post-mortem in the pub aftewards it was the moment when our
team imploded.
2)I would be happier if Arsenal Simon did not wear the away shirt (which looks two or three years old). Obviously, that is a personal opinion.
Changing the subject Spizz was very pleased about his Milan trip while his mate Mick K, (they are both Aston Villa fans) says we could get a game. So the foreign footie tour might be back on!!