Charge of the not so bright brigade

The last game before the clocks go back means that the Autumn / Winter 2014/15 season is now well and truly upon us. I will be mostly wearing black this season, as, in the words of Morrissey, black is how I feel on the inside, what with five months of dark evenings stretching out before us. 

Still, at least there’s the football to cheer us up.

L’organiseur Extraordinaire this week picked the following teams:

Yellow: Ian Gooner, Daniel, Mick, Patrick, Phil, Danny, me, Yev (eventually), Spizz 

Blues: Liam, Mario, Mark, Steve, Simon Gas, Bristol Paul, Paul ‘The Guvnor’ (following Yev’s arrival), Ian Baggies, Simon Ink

Danny started out in goal for the Yellows, who spent the first half of the game a man short until the arrival of Yevgeniy. Despite this deficit, they retained their shape reasonably well and worked hard to stymie the potent Blues’ attack of Mario and Liam. The score during this initial passage of play was around 3-1 to the Blues, who seemed to have the monopoly on defensive players, (Steve and the pair of Bristols (Simon and Paul)), as well as some serious pace in Mario and some tenacity in the Caledonian duo of Liam and Mark. Sadly, Yev’s arrival, which brought parity to the two teams in terms of raw numbers of personnel, saw an abdication of strategy from the Yellows as the majority of the team hurtled forward in a forlorn attempt to get back on terms. This foolhardy Charge of the Bright Bib Brigade had very predictable consequences. 

Much to my chagrin I spent virtually the entire game mired in defence, with Ian Gooner for company. I say chagrin, as I am an appalling defender and initially planned to essay a sort of right half position, but given that once Danny was out of goal we appeared to be playing a suicidal 2-1-5 formation, with Spizz, Yev, Mick, Daniel and Patrick all so far forward that I am not sure who got two of the Yellows three goals. I’m reasonably certain that Yev grabbed one. Maybe I should bring a telescope next week if I get marooned at the back again. 

The Blues seven goals came from a variety of sources – Simon Ink spanked one in from wide on the right following a lay-off from Liam; Mark bundled one home after I came for a high ball and dropped it (I’m blaming the seven pints I’d had the previous night watching Johnny Marr); Steve got another, somewhat controversially, after I’d initially saved a typically fierce effort from Mario and Steve reacted quickly to the rebound and poked it at the goal, where Yev was busy getting changed. The goal was given, despite there being some debate over whether Yev had, in fact, prevented the ball from crossing the line as he changed from his business suit into his kit. Mario was also on the scoresheet, capitalising on some fairly iffy goal-kicks later in the game. 

By the end any semblance of a defensive shape for the Yellows had gone and Liam managed to score from a decent header; if the Blues’ finishing had been better it could have been double figures. 

Final score: Blues 7 Yellows 3

Almost a full house at The Skinners this week, as Ian, Yev and myself – aided and abetted by Steve and Paul - discussed a plethora of issues including real estate in London, car design and the rise of UKIP. It was more interesting than it sounds, honest. 

Until next Friday, when I will not be mentioning Halloween in any way, shape or form because it’s a load of Americanised rubbish designed to part people with money they can ill-afford to spend.